Dreaming Care into Being: Collective Meaning Making, Part III
Reflections on Workshop 3: Consenting Constellations with Meenadchi:
Family constellation work requires deep attunement to play, collective responsibility, and listening. Consent is an embedded practice in family constellation work as the facilitator must deeply question, listen, and respond to the seeker’s embodied consent throughout the constellation. We began last week’s constellation with a mini constellation around medicine I was seeking in regard to parenting my dog Charlie, as it relates to roles, domination, and behavioral outcomes. I noted that I have a challenging relationship with domination, which ultimately reads to me now as a lack of trust in my own ability to care for my dog due to the fact that some of the forms of care he needs fall beyond my comfort level of embodiment. I now feel a sense of purpose in domination. I notice that when I respond with controlled force, directness, and certainty, Charlie is calm, observant, and feels aptly guided. I love this dynamic shift for both of us, which is where I feel the medicine in family constellations lives. The full-length family constellation was about strengthening relationships with receiving. Most of my material and financial access comes from my ability to receive and while I do not feel there is a place of receiving arrival, I do feel there are thresholds as destinations for how deep receiving can be. My deepest joy is in the fact that the seeker consents around this depth, and that is their birthright.
—Kamra Sadia Hakim
The seeker’s eyes, head, and in fact entire body are slumped downwards, all energy sinking into the floor, almost wishing they could disappear. This is an image I have seen often when a person vulnerably chooses to receive a family constellation, and when we are deep in the work and their body is in the process of navigating exposed grief along with embarrassment at taking up too much time and space from the collective. In these moments, I often invite the seeker to gently look up at the faces around them. Although I have been here many times before, I was still struck with awe when this moment occurred during our constellation session and I accompanied the seeker in looking up toward the group. It was important to see so many faces looking back at him with love and generosity, with tender willingness to hold the space, and with affirmation that they too were receiving deep healing through witness, resonance, and participation in the seeker’s journey.
—Meenadchi
Collective Meaning Making
Care Manual: Dreaming Care into Being is part pedagogical text and part archive of lived experience. Designed around a curated glossary, the publication pioneers a very clear theme: that we have the power to author our own ways of being. To bring the manual to life, we will be compiling a glossary specific to the experiences of those participating in the Dreaming Care into Being experiential learning series on-site. This week’s entry comes from a participant’s reflection after undergoing constellation work. To visit previous weeks’ entries, please visit blog posts from Week I and Week II.
Glossary cards made by the participants of Dreaming Care into Being: Collective Meaning Making, Session 3, April 28, 2022, Dia Chelsea, New York.
About Dreaming Care into Being
Facilitated by artist and Activation Residency founder Kamra Sadia Hakim, Dreaming Care into Being is an experiential learning series celebrating the release of Hakim’s book Care Manual: Dreaming Care into Being. The series comprises five workshops developed in collaboration with a series of guest artists, each exploring themes from the publication. This program is inspired by the framework of transformative justice: praxis ought to align with values, and what you believe is how you show up in the world. Dreaming Care into Being is designed to take participants on a somatic journey through the literary work.
The series is free and open to the public. Space is limited and reservations are required. Register for individual or multiple sessions here.